My only excuse is that I was lured away by the games at the AARP website, and by the free episodes of all 20 seasons of the Simpsons online. :) Oh Simpsons, I enjoy your donut-fueled antics and memorable quotes!
On a more serious note-sometimes I get frustrated because it seems like many things worth having are in short supply-friendships, creative opportunities, a job that pays decently, etc... I can easily slip into a negative mode of thinking that these are things I have to compete with other people for, and I don't want to live like that. If God sees "every sparrow" that falls, then surely I can trust that what I need will be provided at the right time. Sometimes I get worried or jealous or angry that I don't have something that someone else does, but I want to practice letting go of that fear and anger and replace it with the knowledge that God has already blessed me in many ways, and that there is no need to fear that I'm being shortchanged. This is starting to sound like "Chicken Soup for the Soul." Haha. I'm just grateful that my overall outlook is much better than it was even 4 months ago. It's horrible to feel depressed and anxious and despairing and know that a lot of it is your own fault, but not know how to get out of it, and it's wonderful to be able to look back and see how much better I feel now, and feel grateful for that.
Here are some things I've been enjoying lately:
1. eating my roommate's animal crackers in bed.
2. playing mah jong and spider solitaire and boggle online
3. the onion and squash stir fry I ate for dinner
4. mowing the lawn
5. lolcats because I don't have cats of my own to moon over
6. going to see 2 movies back to back one night by myself-it was like a mini-vacation (Iron Man-with Mickey Rourke as an AWESOME bad guy, and Robert Downey Jr as his usual witty self, and the Prince of Persia with Jake Gyllenhal as eye candy)
7. new shampoo and body wash that smell great and have no sulfates
8. discovering new crafts that use old plastic bottles
9. talking to my mom on our lunch breaks
10. working at the mall and getting to be around a lot of people
11. thinking about getting a violin, and making a list of songs I want to learn to play
12. knowing that not everyone is going to like me/understand me, but also knowing that I am free to let those relationships go so that I can put my energy into relationships with people who DO like me. Sometimes it bothers me (alot!) when people aren't open with me or when they don't make an effort to be friends, but really, I have to accept that instead of trying to change them. That is a huge mistake I've made in the past-expending energy to try to make people be my friends, when that is silly. You can't make someone else DO anything! All you/I can do it accept it, let it go and focus on the people who ARE open to us.
13. realizing that I really like life and that I'd be grateful for the time I've had if I died today
14. 70's classic rock and KXT public radio. Except for the crazy poetry spoken over jazz tunes....there is just no excuse for combining the two.
15. summer blockbusters
16. Rosa's mexican rice and beans
17. how awesome my mom and dad are... my dad can run 2 six minute miles back to back, reads the encyclopedia for fun, and was locked in the Kremlin once. My mom can draw your blood, defends us against rattlesnakes and possums, and can cook anything.
18. summer!!!
